I grew up attending church and had a basic understanding of who God was but my motivation to confess Jesus as my Lord and Savior was out of fear of one day being separated from my believing family. But, it was obvious as I got older that my thoughts, words, and actions were not any different than the world around me. My goal, in middle school and high school, was to live for myself and get recognition through appearance, status, and relationships. I tried to convince myself that I wasn’t really that bad because there were so many others worse than me, but at the end of it all, I was lost in my sin and truly empty. Further in high school the cost of gaining these vain pursuits kept getting higher. I couldn’t keep up and neither could the relationships I relied on so heavily.
I stopped trying and stopped going to school. I didn’t think anyone would notice or care. Surprisingly, two girls in my algebra class noticed. They moved toward me at such a difficult time in my life. I was shocked by this especially because they knew my reputation. They invited me to their church’s student ministry. There I began learning about God’s loving character in ways I had never heard before. One night I cried out to God. I confessed my sin and my deep need for Him to be my Savior. I felt the weight of His sacrifice to make me a part of His family and knew He was the only One that deserved my full allegiance. I was washed over with a worth that was steady and sure.
The Lord cultivated in me a hunger to know Him more. I poured over His word, not over obligation but out of a desperate need to know this God that pursued me even when I wanted nothing to do with Him. Since committing my life to Him, He has done great work in healing me and uprooting many of the holds that sin had on my life. He has been reliable and near during lonely and trying seasons. I tried to find a savior outside of Him but He proves time and time again there is none like Him. Praise God!